The Mary Sue Parody of Avatar: The Last Airbender
by AND4I
Summary: This is what, insomnia and reading horrible fanfiction involving massively narccistical and egomaniac mary sues can do to you. Oneshot. Comedy. Rating to be on the safe side.


In a small village a young man, who looked seventeen, was walking down an alley in an abandoned market when he heard that voice, singing that song.  
"I was lying on the grass on sunday morning of last week"  
The teenager's eyes widened in horror, it was her, he began to sprint as fast as he could.  
"Indulging in my self defeats my mind was thugged, all laced and bugged, all twisted round and beat"  
The boys name was Aang, and he was running from Mary Sue, the devil personified.  
He had no idea where Iroh was, he had told him to run somewhere safe. Mary Sue was only after him.  
"Uncomfortable three feet deep now the fuzzy stare from not being there on a confusing morning week"  
No longer running he collasped on the ground. 'Might as well face her,' he thought. He could hear her tormenting song, in her perfect voice.  
"Impaired my tribal lunar-speak and of course you can't become if you only say what you would have done,  
so I missed a million miles of fun"  
His heart was still beating fast and the oncoming bone-chilling horro that is Mary Sue was not helping.  
The girl who had been following him, the gang and even zuko, trying to seduce all of them into her evil ways, was now standing probably five feet in front of him still singing her terrible song. She stepped out from underneath the shadow she was concealed beneath. She leaned down to where Aang was.  
"I know it's up for me if you steal my sunshine making sure i'm not in too deep if you steal my sunshine keeping versed and on my feet if you steal my sunshine"  
'SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" Zuko said grasping his ears for fear that blood would be oozing out of them, "That is the worst song ever! Please shut up!!" Trying to look brave in front of his worst nightmare, he shivered as she got even closer to his face.  
"Oh, but ZuZu-poo, you have just married with me, only the best deserve the best, but no... you had go off and be all emo-agnsty, and help the Avatar redeeming your Princieness! You stole all the attention away from me and my beautiful body!  
My 32C's! My Shoulder-Blade length blade hair! My gorgeous color-changing eyes! My home-made yet still absoluetly elegent dress!" she was practically screeching now, " my abilities to bend every single element! My ability to talk to animals! My ability to"  
"SHUT UP YOU NARCISSTIC DRAMA QUEEN!" Zuko didn't care if she killed him, death was the lesser of two evils then marrying this freak.  
"Zuko." She stated, in a deadly tone.  
"SHUT UP"  
"That's is Zuko, you'red dead." She said smiling.  
"Thank you"  
"What"  
"Kill me now with your god-like powers please! It's much better then marrying you"  
"What? Nobody should be happy about not marrying me or dying..." she said confused.  
"You are the worst person ever! You and all of your million clones! I would rather kill myself then marry you or even go out with you"  
"ZUKO!! YOU WILL NOW FACE YOUR DEATH BY MY GOD-LIKE POWERS!!! I WILL KILL YOU WITH THE SWORD OF RAIJIN! THEN MY MUTANT BUNNIE RABBITS AND MALLAMKEYS THAT ONLY I CAN CONTROL WILL DEVOUR WHAT IS LEFT"  
He silently thanked whatever deity was allowing him death, but he would have perferred to die more ceramoiniously, then murdered.  
Mary Sue summoned The sword of Raijin from nowhere, and started speaking a spell that only Mary Sue could.  
Just then a drunken Iroh came walking out the back door of a Pub nearby singing as loud and off-key as he could,  
"It's nine o'clock on a Saturday The Regular crowd shuffles in There's an old man sitting next to me Makin' love to his tonic and gin

He says, "Son, can you play me a memory I'm not really sure how it goes But it's sad and it's sweet and I knew it complete When I wore a younger man's clothes."

La la la, di da da La la, di da da da dum"  
Mary Sue stopped her spell and dropped the sword and practically hissed, "SSSSSTOP! THAT HORRIBLE NOISE"  
Zuko observed Mary Sue's reaction at this, "Keep singing Iroh! Apparently good music is her weakness"  
"No!!!! SSSTOP!" She screached.  
"Sing us a song, you're the piano man Sing us a song tonight Well, we're all in the mood for a melody And you've got us all feelin' alright"  
Just then a very drunken Iroh tripped over his own feet and spilt what was left of his alchoholic beavarage onto to Mary Sue.  
" NOOOOOOOO! I"M MELTING!" Mary Sue said as she disappeard in a fog of steam.  
"Of course why didn't I see it! Mary Sue can't stand anything that isn't pure!!" Zuko practically yelled, "or good music!" he added quickly.  
Zuko looked triumphant as he saw what was left Mary Sue was a pile of ashes.  
"It's over!" He said as he collasped to the ground unconsious, while a still drunken Iroh walked away then ungraciously heaved his dinner.  
But...as Zuko was passed out a wind starting to twirl the ashes upward, and they started to take a shape, the shape of a Mary Sue clone!  
Thus reincarnating Mary Sue.  
This New Mary Sue had black hair instead of the last one's red, but still with the same almost in human beauty. She leaned down to Zuko and laughed.  
"Doesn't he know nothing can ever permamently kill a Mary Sue??? We're just too God-like!" she cackled and walked away, to find another suitable spouse in some other universe. 


End file.
